Affecting Our Culture In 2017

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Christmas Presents All Year Long!

When I was six years old my father died. I don't remember much about that year, but I do remember spending the summer after his death with my only uncle and aunt. Uncle Al and Aunt Becky "took me in" during a difficult time for this young boy.

Later that year, my aunt and uncle visited my mom, sisters, and me for Christmas. I had just turned seven, and was very excited about their visit. The previous summer had forged a strong bond between my uncle and myself.

When they arrived, I helped my uncle unload his car. It was filled with Christmas presents! I remember carrying into our house armload after armload of presents. As I carried them in, I would look at the tags, and saw gift after gift that said "To: Bradley". It was going to be a great Christmas for me!

Imagine my disappointment when opening gifts on Christmas morning, most of the ones tagged "To: Bradley” actually read "To: Becky". You see being only seven, I hadn't learned to read cursive writing yet, and I thought Becky was Bradley.

I did receive some nice gifts from my uncle and aunt. I got over the disappointment of less gifts than anticipated. Life went on.

As Believers, the opposite is true. We have been given the greatest gift of all: Eternal life through Jesus. But we have been given many more gifts, and we don't take them: New mercies every morning, a guarantee of all of our needs met, help in solving problems, the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead living inside us... God's Word is filled with the gifts that He has given us.

Imagine how disappointed God is because He has given us so many gifts, and yet we leave them under the tree, unopened.

May we receive what God has given us everyday, and live lives of faith and victory because of all that the Lord has given us!

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Without A Home At Christmas

There were two times in recent years where I was a man without a home. Call it transition. Call it between places. Call it what you want.

One time our family was in the process of moving to Florida from Maryland. I was joining the staff of a church to help while its pastor was gravely ill. My wife and daughter had already moved down there with our "stuff".

I stayed in Maryland because my current church was keeping me on for a few months to aid in the transition of my responsibilities.

I rotated staying at three different friend’s houses in Maryland in their guest rooms. All of my “stuff” that I didn't load onto our moving truck was crammed into the back of my Mini Cooper. Because I was a man without a home. 

I worked three-and-a-half days in Maryland, and three-and-a-half days in Florida, commuting via air between the two places. I did this for three months.

Another time, I was helping a friend start a new business in South Florida, while my family remained in Northwest Florida. I slept on my son’s couch in Ft. Lauderdale, stayed in a friend’s condo, and stayed in a room on the church campus where I led worship. I lived out of my suitcase and Mini Cooper. I visited my family as much as I could. I did this for a year.

Both times I was without a home was during the Christmas Season.

That was my story. It reminds me of the story of another man without a home. He began his life being born in a borrowed feed trough in a borrowed cattle stall.

He once said of himself that he had no place to lay his head.

He traveled a lot too. Not so much commuting, but rather purposeful journeys on foot to be involved in people's lives.

All of his clothes weren't crammed into the back of a Mini Cooper, but rather were worn on his back.

This same man without a home gave up his life so I could have a home in heaven. I am grateful.

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Thanksgiving Tragedy

A horrific school bus crash occurred this Thanksgiving week in our area. As of this writing, five children have died and 23 were injured. Many people I know in this area are talking about this non-stop.

Just a few hours earlier, another horrific crash occurred. This time it was a train derailment. As of this writing, 146 people have died, and dozens of others were hurt, many critically. Many who were killed were a part of a wedding party. Many who were killed were children.

Hardly anyone in my area is talking about this crash, because it happened half-way around the world in India. Why is no one talking about it? Because only when it affects us does it matter to us.

Here are some other tragedies we face on Thanksgiving Day: 

Turkey not cooked perfectly? Tens of millions of people around the world will not even have a meal on Thanksgiving Day. It’s only one of your several meals that day.

Stuck in traffic? Only 8.5% of the world's population have an automobile. It's only a delay.

House too small for your Thanksgiving festivities? Over 100 million people in the world don't even have a house. It's only for one day.

Flight delayed? Almost 95% of the world's population has never flown. It's only an inconvenience.

Lines too long on Black Friday? The median income worldwide is $2,000 ($5.50/day. For most people it's under $2/day). It's only an iPhone.

Turkey too small to feed everyone? An estimated 75% of Americans are overweight. It's only another slice.

Although I grieve for the families of the school children here in the Chattanooga area, I also grieve for the Indian people and their families. Around the world or here at home, let’s make Thanksgiving about others, and not about ourselves.

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Why It Doesn't Matter Who Wins The Election

Today is election day, and I voted. But for me, it doesn't matter who wins the election.

Call me unprincipled. Call me uninvolved. Call me unAmerican. But make sure you call me a Christian.

I'm not giving the "it doesn't matter who wins the election, God is still on His throne" easy statement here. Rather, my convictions will not change, my beliefs will not adjust, and my purpose will not alter. No matter who wins the election.

My belief in God and His purpose and plan for those who believe in Him is not determined by who holds public office.

As a Believer in Christ, life may get more difficult for me because of my beliefs. In fact, I'm pretty sure it will get more difficult. But life doesn't revolve around me and how easy my life should be.

As a Believer in Christ, it may be more advantageous to compromise on my convictions so I can fit in with my culture. But we haven't been called to fit in with our culture.

Copying and pasting Facebook posts are not going to be a valid way of identifying myself as a Believer in Christ. I am going to have to publicly live out the Christian life in front of everybody. And I will be judged for it.

I don't want to live out my beliefs because I fear God will judge me for not living out my convictions. Rather, I want to live out my beliefs because I am a Christian.

I am grateful that I have the opportunity to vote for a person to lead our country. But my position as a Believer in Christ transcends my position as a citizen of this nation. So for me as a Christian, it doesn't matter who wins the election.

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Created By The Creator

Created works are usually identified as being a work of their creator.

We identify the monster pictured as Frankenstein, but in reality, Frankenstein is the name of the doctor who created the monster.

We have heard it said, “That’s a Rembrandt” when referring to one of his paintings. If I told you I owned the original Starry Night you might think I was referring to the Don McLean song recorded in 1971. But if I told you I owned a Van Gogh's Starry Night, you would know exactly what I was referring to.

The same is true about music. We identify songs as "a U2 song" or "a Matt Redmond tune". When F. Murray Abraham, playing Antonio Salieri in the 1984 movie Amadeus hummed the song Eine kleine Nachtmusik, he identified it to his audience by saying, "That is Motzart."

Created works cannot be separated from the one who created them. The creator will always put part of themselves into their work.

Thus, the created work will always point to the creator, showing nuances, hints and signatures that mark it as theirs. The created work cannot free itself from the hand of the creator. It is not an independent entity which has no identity apart from its creator.

In the same way, we as created beings are known by the One who created us. But sometimes the creation is given more consideration than the creator. Romans 1:25 in the bible tells us that …people exchanged the truth for a lie, and served created things rather than the Creator. 

Although the world in which we live gives us an identity apart from our Creator, we can't shake off the fact that everyone's identity is tied to their Creator. They may reject it. They may ignore it. They can't deny it. But it doesn’t change the fact.

Our Creator has signed us with His personal mark of ownership. It is expressed in our own creativity. It flows through our dreams. It is the root of our passion. Every one of us are people who have been created with purpose. That purpose is to point back to the One who created us. Lead Well!

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Happy Birthday!

Today is my birthday, and it's a significant one: 60! As I write this post, I am struggling with the fact that this post is about me. I try to live by the principle of be interested, not interesting. Today I hope that I am interesting enough that it will be a benefit to you...

For this birthday, although I am looking more closely at my own mortality, I am looking over my shoulder at my life up to this point. The question I am asking is: What is my legacy?

What am I leaving behind me that has built the Kingdom of God? What lives have I invested in that are now making a difference in their world? Have I built into a life that is in turn building into another's life, and that life is building into another? Am I reproducing generations of leaders and world-changers?

Early in my life and ministry it was all about me. I was on the ego-boosting roller coaster of pride, arrogance, and self-importance. I sought the 15 minutes of fame, and wanted it to last for years.

I began to realize that the world didn't revolve around me (go figure). My desires, my interests, and my attentions were misplaced. I was focusing on things that are inconsequential.

Rather, the world revolves around God and what He desires to do in my life and in the lives of those around me.

Although during the last few decades I have been seeking to live a life of more humility and more Kingdom of God building, there are still traces of those old attributes that show themselves in me. I do not like them. I do not treasure them. Now, they are repulsive to me.

But as I look back, and continue to look forward (I'm not that old), I am encouraged. I still can have an influence for God's Kingdom. Before me lies more days and years to have an impact on people. God still has plans for my life, and He desires to work those plans...

My prayer continues to be these lyrics:

My hands, my feet: an offering.

Your will I choose to do.

When time has passed the world will see

My legacy is You.

Lead Well!

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Can You Hear The Applause?

We hear applause everywhere: At political rallies, at sporting events, at concerts, and yes, even in worship services (not a bad thing if the applause are directed to the Lord).

What is interesting to me though, is the type and amount of applause that is being offered up. Each setting is different, yet the clapping and cheering are pretty much the same.

Applause is a two-edged sword. On the one hand (no pun intended), it encourages the receiver to go forward, press on, and work harder. But on the other hand (still no pun intended), it can become like a drug that causes people to do things so they can receive more.

And that brings me to the question that I am so fond of asking not only to myself, but to others also: Why do you do what you do? Is it because you have a deep-seated need to express yourself in the area that you have been gifted (profession, arts, sports, etc.)? Or do you simply do it for the applause?

Each of us were created with gifts, talents, and abilities. Are we using those gifts, talents, and abilities to receive applause (it can come in other forms besides clapping), or are we exercising those gifts, talents, and abilities to make life better for others? 

Which brings me to another one of those questions: Are we living for ourselves, or are we living for others?

When the applause are over, how do you feel? Empty? Fulfilled? Wanting more?

Think about it. I applaud your consideration. Lead Well!

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Proud To Be Humble

Humility. Some people seek attention, praise, and honor. Some people seek to simply be hidden. But, I believe everyone struggles with humility.

Please know that I struggle with humility like everyone else. 

Consider what Proverbs 22:4 says: Humility and the fear of the Lord bring wealth and honor and life.

One thing I find interesting in this verse: Humility brings honor.

Humility and pride are a difficult balancing act for Believers. Among other things we are redeemed, forgiven, seated with Christ in heavenly places, protected, gifted, abundantly blessed, favored, and called God’s Children. Wow! With all of those characteristics, it can be easy to be prideful.

But what is humility? Humility is not demeaning ourselves (“I’m just a sinner saved by grace…”). We are so much more than that! (See the list above…) Humility is not squashing our egos. When we try to, we tend to pride ourselves in squashing our egos. 

Humility is basically directing our egos away from ourselves. Rick Warren once said in The Purpose Driven Life, "Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less."

How can we demonstrate humility? In two ways: Give all praise to God for anything we are praised for. After all, everything comes from Him. We are created by Him, gifted by Him, empowered by Him, and are used by Him.

In the same way, when praising others, don’t praise the person, praise the Lord.

When we praise others, we oftentimes are building their egos and making it difficult for them to walk in humility.

Praise God when someone else does well. Again, it is the Lord who created them, gave them abilities, and is working through them.

Secondly, give away what we have as Believers. (Again, see the list above.) Our relationship with Christ is not for us to hoard, but to share. Gloat in what I have, or give what I have? That’s a question we should all ask ourselves.

May we walk in humility. May we share what we have with others. May we expand the Kingdom of God locally and around the world… In humility! Lead Well!

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How To Not Be So Interesting

Most people love to talk about themselves, and most people have become pretty good at it.

A few weeks ago I wrote in this space a Blog titled "Do We Talk Too Much?" where I mentioned this thought: Be interested, not interesting. I went on to say that when someone shares a thought or relates a story, instead of giving my opinion, or sharing my own story and thoughts on the matter, I stop and allow that person to share some more.

Some of us are more interesting than others. Some of us are the most entertaining person in the room. Some of us are just plain odd (a description my wife sometimes places on me). But all of us can become not so interesting.

How can we do that? By simply becoming interested in the other person/people around us. We can do that by asking good questions.

Allow me to share some questions to ask which will make us less interesting and more interested:

• How did you spend your long-weekend? (Instead of "Let me tell you what I did on my long-weekend...") If they ask us how we spent ours, we can respond: "I had a great time away with my family. What about you?" 
• What are some of the books you are reading? (Instead of "Let me tell you about this book I just read...") If we are asked what we are reading, we can share the title of the book(s) and then quickly follow-up with: What about you? (By the way, that was a subtle hint to turn off the TV and read.)
• How is it going at your job? (Instead of "Let me tell you what happened at my work this week...") Again, if we are asked this question, we can give a quick response, and then ask: How is it going at your job?
• What is your favorite (hardest, most challenging, best) part of your job (vacation, hobby, childhood memory)? You get the picture...

In summary:

• Ask questions that people want to be asked.
• Allow questions that we are asked to be a springboard for another's response by simply asking it back. 
• Go deeper than "Did you see the (your favorite team) game?" Life is more than sports.
• Ask questions that are open-ended and allow others to share what is important to them.

Do you see the theme here? It's not difficult to direct attention away from ourselves and allow others to share about their dreams, goals, and lives. That is how true relationships are built. That is how we can add value to other's lives. Lead Well!

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Do You Have An Alibi?

I was having a lively and fun exchange earlier today with the pastor whom I serve alongside of. He is a former prosecuting attorney before he entered full-time ministry.

He jokingly said in our open office for all to hear that I had left a door unlocked. I responded that although accused of the crime, I had a great defense attorney and wasn't worried. He in turn asked if I had an alibi. I told him I didn't need an alibi as long as I had a great attorney. And if I needed to, I could produce 12 witnesses, all of them my grandmother, that would swear that I was with them when the door was allegedly left unlocked.

We laughed, but I began to think about alibis. Usually they are associated with a crime, when a person needs someone to vouch for them. Often they are accurate. Sometimes they are fabricated.

Have you ever needed an alibi? Have you ever fabricated an alibi to assert innocence, even when you were guilty?

Integrity. The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles and moral uprightness.

I believe that integrity is the issue here. If we are known for our integrity, we wouldn't need an alibi. The fact that our word can be trusted goes a long way towards proving that what we say is right.

Integrity may not stand up in a court of law, but it surely stands up in the condition of life.

By the way, I was eight miles away visiting someone in a hospital, with three other witnesses (neither of which are my grandmother), during the time that the door was allegedly left unlocked!

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What's In It For Me?

What’s in it for me? I believe that is the most often asked question that is never formally asked in our culture. People tend to make decisions, choices, and recommendations based on what they can get out of it.

Look around: The vast majority of people are seeking to get, and they are seeking to get for themselves.

Follow advertising: 99% of all advertising seeks to “scratch a particular itch” that people have.

Listen to conversations: People are constantly maneuvering and re-shaping conversations towards themselves and their desires, needs, and experiences.

Is that true about us as Christians? Are we people who usually evaluate life based on What’s in it for me? If it is, should that be true about us as Believers?

God’s Word makes it very clear that life is to be lived for God (see the Greatest Commandment), and for others (see the 2nd Greatest Commandment). In other words, we should always be asking the question: What’s in to for them? (What's in it for God, and what's in it for others).

This is what I call a Kingdom Mindset. That is, seeking to build up the Kingdom of God, rather than our personal kingdoms. You might say that seeing what’s in it for you is ok, as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else. But we must again look at the 1st and 2nd Greatest Commandments of Jesus. Are we loving the Lord with all of our hearts, and are we loving others, in everything we do?

May I encourage us to ask the question: What’s in to for them? in everything we do: At work, while watching TV, while conversing, at the store, on FaceBook, even when worshipping on Sundays…

Are we making it about me, or about them? Lead Well!

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Do We Talk Too Much?

I know I am being contradictory right out of the chute, speaking to you through a Blog post titled "Do We Talk Too Much?" But allow me to ask and comment on that question...

Do We Talk Too Much? Every where look (listen) people are talking: Political candidates, commentators, announcers, parents, children, friends, DJs, commercials, talk radio (no surprise there), newscasters, and... Us. We call, text, comment, post, comment on posts, comment on other's comments on posts... Well, you get the picture.

Do you quickly comment "I do that." or "I love that too!" or "I know what you mean." when listening to another person?

There seems to be a lot coming out of our mouths. But have you considered if it might be beneficial to not talk after you hear someone else say something, but rather probe deeper and allow the other person to have the opportunity to say more?

One of my life principles that I seek to consistently model is this: Be interested, not interesting. What I seek to do is this: When someone tells a story, relates an experience, or makes a comment, instead of giving my opinion, sharing my own story or thoughts on the matter, I stop myself and ask the person to clarify, or ask how they feel about it. Or simply, I don't verbally respond, but use my facial expression to communicate.

Usually, we like to make everything about us. Our experience. Our struggle. Our history. Our victory. But should we be doing that?

Evaluate your last conversation. Look at your last Facebook post or comment. Re-read your last text conversation. Was it about the other person, or about you? Did you turn the conversation around to reflect your ideas, your story, or your comment and opinion?

What would happen if instead of turning someone's comment, experience, opinion, or story into what we want to say, we allowed it to remain about the other person? What if we simply said "Good for you!" (when something good happens to someone), or "Wow, that's gotta be tough" (when others experience difficulty)?

Here are some ideas to try:

• Ask yourself, "Why am I talking?" When verbalizing something, or writing a Facebook post or comment, or texting, ask yourself why you are talking (commenting, posting). Are you talking about you or them?
• Practice asking the other person," And what else?" So often we immediately jump in and speak before we hear the entire story or experience the other person is seeking to relate. Ask for more, instead of contributing.
• Ask the other person, "What do you think? or "How do you feel about that?" Those two questions go a long way in clarifying the other person's heart as they communicate.

Allow me to exhort you: Be interested, not interesting. Stop yourself from speaking while another is speaking, or immediately when they are done. Allow conversations to be about someone else besides ourselves. Lead Well!

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Manliness And My Mini Cooper

A few days ago I was walking across the parking lot to my Mini Cooper and someone called out, "Why do you drive a Mini Cooper? That's a 'girlie' car!"

I was surprised by that comment! I actually did not know that a type of car determined if I was "girly" or not. Interesting...

I consider myself to be a relatively well-read person, but apparently I have not come across the book "What You Drive Determines Your Manliness". And if that book actually does exist (I googled it and couldn't find it), who made the rules on what is considered a manly or girly car?

It is interesting how our culture writes and rewrites "rules" to determine a person's place in that culture. One day a type of food or style of music ls considered acceptable. Two weeks later it is bad for you or obsolete.

(The movie "The Italian Job" popularized the Mini Cooper here in the US, and interestingly one of the Minis used in the movie was driven by the actor Jason Statham, who in that movie and in other roles always plays a man's man.)

We find this same influence in the western church. Music and ministry styles come and go with much frequency. This leader says church should be done this way. After the next conference we find out that church should be done a different way. (For me, it's all about God's Word and the Presence of God.)

But back to manliness and my Mini Cooper. By driving one, I am not seeking to impress my peers. Nor am I trying to be attractive to other women.

I dive a Mini Cooper simply because it's fun to drive. My wife will say I drive it because it is great on gas mileage and I am cheap. She is absolutely right! Great mileage and fun to drive... Not a bad couple of reasons to drive one!

The one place where I do find manliness defined is in God's Word. Among other things, it clearly says that I am to love my wife, give myself for her, lay down my life for my friends, pray without ceasing, consider others more important than myself, not gossip, and seek after God always. That defines if I am manly.

But no mention of a Mini Cooper. Lead Well!

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